Success stories

The story of Abdukahor *, 46 years old, father of 4 children, resident of Levakant

Abdukahor  says that at the moment of contacting by local police he was is “an ordinary man” from Tajikistan- with behaviour that clearly shows that husband is the head of household, often insulting and beating his wife. Such treatment was considered as a widely accepted and traditional; his wife and four children were experiencing physical and psychological sufferings from his actions. He had irregular jobs in constructions, and the tensions in the family usually start when they had not enough money for food – so he was rude to his wife and would started a quarrel for no reason. One day his wife got serious injury because of domestic violence, and addressed to local hospital. She told to doctor about happen things, and the doctor reported to local police. At the moment she left the hospital, the policeman issued a Protection order and obliged Abdukahor to visit the [Aggressors Behaviour Correction] Counselling Room (in Levakant) for 30-hours behaviour correction sessions, services of which are aimed at correction of behaviour of family aggressors.

At beginning of conversation with specialists from the Counselling Room, Abdukahor was not recognizing his behaviour; he was minimalizing the impact of his actions, and even blamed his wife for his behaviour. He was trying to “normalize” his behaviour arguing that “the ordinary life of Tajik families is like that”. He tried to escape from the counselling sessions, but the policeman came to take him from home to conduct the prophylactic discussions – the legislative task of the law enforcement. Being shamed that neighbours would see him convoyed, he voluntarily attended later on the courses. 

After learning relevant lessons and knowledge on the root causes of violence, the consequences of violence and the need of maintaining household values of harmonious relationships, Abdukahor understood and realized that behaviour and actions committed by him were violent and prohibited by law.  After having gone through the sessions on behaviour correction, he realized that it was he who can and should change the behaviour, for the sake of his family. He realized how much damage the domestic violence brings to his children and wife. Since he was a religious person, he was amused to find out from the religious leader that the holly scripts prohibit beating of wives and children. The lawyer told him about the legal consequences of committing domestic violence acts, especially repeated ones. His wife was referred to a psychologist, and she got a protection support from the Women’s Counselling Room staff (Levarant). The specialist from the Women’s Counselling Room was always calling/meeting his wife and asking about the situation in their family, as well as the local police officer. The social worker helped him to find a job in his city - even the salary was not high, it was regular paid so he could provide for his family.

In several months of frequent meetings with specialists of the [Aggressors Behaviour Correction] Counselling Room, Abdukahor observed that he became much calmer and restored his control over his behaviour. The peace and smile returned to his family, the children were amused and happy to live in a peaceful and calm environment. He is glad that participated in the behavior correction program, and now he knows that he is the one who can make happy his family.

* the names of the heroes of the stories have been changed